General: QDB

<Jake> so I got dissed by this girl i was talking to online
<Jake> we were getting along really well and she wanted to meet
<Jake> but she wanted a picture
<Jake> so I sent her one (got one of hers, she was fine)
<Jake> she said "I'm really looking for some one more 'athletic'"
<Jake> bummer
<Jake> so i say
<Jake> well im trying hard, ever since i have been able to afford the full time trainer and chef I've lost over 200 lbs
<Jake> she says you can afford a trainer/chef
<Jake> i say yeah
<Jake> she changes her mind about meeting
<Jake> i tell her to go fuck herself

<\\`es> fuck i just downloaded 5 crazytown mp3's. What the fuck is happening with me

<EnDs> N E 1 have that song u know the one from woodstolk?

<Dareon> It hasn't loaded all the way yet, but there better be a schoolgirl at the end of those tentacles.
<Dareon> ...Wrong window. >_<
<Zephy> lmao

(maffewz) little women is on, i'm sure every lesbian with a tivo is filling up hard drive space

<[sPaG]> I USED TO LISTEN TO NSYNC WHEN THEY WERE UNDERGROUND

<Volt3kker>whats cntrl + F do on boot ?
<RogueFoxx> initates the self destruct sequence
<scot> it does?
<scot> is that what it really does?

<Lord-Data> spanish girls like come with a tan by default
<Lord-Data> its like they come factory fitted with a fully body kit :)

<gaspump> It takes more than tits to impress me.
<gaspump> Lord knows everyone in here should already know that.
<Richard_D_James> It's hard to masturbate to intelligence, though.

<+snow_veil> if (age > 14) pork(); else give_candy();

<shmooo> i cant wait to see my gf tonite
<shmooo> im gonna eat her sweet pussy
<gortho> we're happy for you
<shmooo> it's like sweet strawberries
<psmylie> what?!?
<psmylie> ...
<psmylie> you're a virgin, aren't you?

<RadiX> I had a thought
<Isando> Wow it must have come as a surprise to you.
<RadiX> at first I thought it was a headache.. I wasn't sure what it was.

(Judge_) This dumb and dumber 2 movie is actually a prequal.
(Judge_) Star Wars did it, so why can't every body else I guess
(Judge_) "Austin Powers: THe Gradeschool Years"
<deww> yeah it's a prequel. blah.
<deww> they did that in the last movie tho
<deww> hehe
(Judge_) "Indiana Jones and the full diaper"
(Judge_) that is teh sux
<deww> "Single Chinned IRCers"
<deww> now THAT's a prequel

<A|exander> i bet aguilera would be as dirty as fuck
<DarthJesus> I dunno'
<DarthJesus> I think she'd be too self involved to want to do anything for you
<A|exander> not if i knocked her unconscious first.

<influx> heh what is it with irc and gay jokes?
<zaggy> influx: they go together like my penis and your juicy ass

<andjusticeforall> I've figured it out. If you ever get mugged by someone, just say, "Take it easy man, all I got is a $16 bill", then knee him in the nuts when he tries to figure out what the fuck you just said.

<Chrizto> show me a chick worth worrying about after you're not the one fucking them anymore and I'll show you the value of the imaginary number i

<limeking> Hey jen, ya wanna come over and we can wrap ourseves in plastic, shit ourselvves, and then eat our own shit while listening to MC hammer?
<Jennie254> Ewwwww gross!
<Jennie254> That's fucked up! Why would you even THINK I'd want to listen to MC Hammer??

<windows_macgeek> Is there a way to overclock a compact flash card to have more storage?
<InvisableMan> umm..... can you overclock the memory in your computer to give you more storage?
<windows_macgeek> HAHAHA!!!! Of course not, idiot!
<InvisableMan> you just took the words right out of my mouth.
<windows_macgeek> ...Oh.

<billa> lol
<billa> sif
<billa> talk to the hand
<billa> cause the cock aint listening
<JtHM> that'd make you the cock....
<billa> yes
<billa> damn.

I had a thought
Wow it must have come as a surprise to you.
at first I thought it was a headache.. I wasn't sure what it was.

Made made me ROFL good.

Are you home now Pura?

xD Welcome back =)